By: Jennifer Murray

What Makes a Marriage Last 57 Years?

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My parents celebrated 57 years of marriage this week!  It’s no small accomplishment, or feat. It’s been 57 years of choosing to love and respect one another through the thick and thin.  My parents have weathered lots of storms together over the last five decades, but they’ve continued to be an incredible example of marriage to me and so many others.  I’m so thankful for their faithfulness and loyalty that I’ve been able observe, and model in my own marriage.

I decided to ask my mom a few questions about marriage and share them with you, because I think there’s so much we can glean through someone who has loved for better and for worse, regardless of circumstances. My mom of course in her humility, didn’t feel like she had much to offer, but I think there’s so much wisdom in her words.

How Did You and Dad Meet?

Your Dad and I were friends before we started dating. He was from Covington and I was from Veedersburg, just 8 miles apart and so many kids were acquainted with each other through sporting events, music programs, skating rink, other extracurricular programs.  When he asked me for a date, I was surprised but pleased.

How Did You Know He Was “The One”?

I think the thing that made me know that he was THE ONE was when he wrote me a letter while I was in college and told me that he was praying for me.  No other guy had ever told me that.  Also, when I went to the park and observed him working with the Pony League baseball team, my heart just melted.

How Much Did Your Wedding Cost in 1957?

I was working at Olin (a local factory in our town in the office) during our engagement and early dating. I was able to save $300.00 which was more than enough to pay for all of the bride’s responsibility. My dress:$50.00;Veil:15.00:Cake:$35.00:Flowers & candelabra rental: $35.00: Photo album containing 12 8×10 black & white photos:$25.00. (also this included 1 8×10 colored photo & glossy b&w photo for newspaper). I can’t remember the price of my shoes and crinoline were. I forgot to mention that the flower shop also furnished the aisle candles on each pew with flowers & ribbon as it was a candlelight evening wedding. Can you imagine the cost it would have been today? To be real though, we have to realize that wages in 1957 were certainly much less than today.

What Have Been Some Highlights of Your 57 Years of Marriage?

The highlights of our 57 years was the birth of each child and the desire to make our home stable for them to grow up in.  Each birth made us more aware of our love for each other and gratefulness to God.

How Have You Stayed in Love and Loyal for Over Five Decades?

I think the way  we have stayed in love and been loyal is by being thankful for each other, trusting each other fully, and being respectful to one another.  Praying together is the best insurance for this. I learned time and time again that God is right about the husband being the head.

What Advice Would You Share With Those of Us Who Are In Our First Decade or so of Marriage?

You have been through the hard years of getting adjusted to one another and learning to put each other ahead of self.  Now you must be careful not to take each other for granted but to continue to love and honor each other.  Concentrate on each other’s strengths and overlook the weaknesses. Take time to be alone together when you can talk and plan without interruption.  When you pray together, thank the Lord for giving your mate to you.  You can’t stay mad at each other when you do this.

Thanks so much, Mom for giving us a rare opportunity to learn from a marriage that has lasted, thrived, and persevered through these years.  I’m thankful for 57 years that you and dad have had to spend your lives together, and look forward to celebrating each and every year to follow.

5 Responses to “What Makes a Marriage Last 57 Years?”

  1. Elizabeth
    February 26, 2014 at 6:27 pm #

    Would you please stop making me cry? Honestly, love the post, and so MANY of us need those words of wisdome. Congratulations to your Mom & Dad.

  2. Holly
    February 28, 2014 at 4:13 am #

    This is heartwarming to read. We’re 6 years into our marriage and with two toddlers our relationship sometimes feels a little more strained than it used to. So good to read your mom’s tips. Especially about putting one’s spouse first and not taking them for granted. I needed to hear that today!

  3. Siob
    February 28, 2014 at 9:49 pm #

    Jen, what a beautiful post and an awesome example your parents are! Hope you are feeling so much better friend, and recovering is smoother. I’ve been thinking so much about you!

  4. Adele
    March 1, 2014 at 3:37 am #

    Beautiful advice. Congratulations to your parents. Thank you for sharing this with us.

    I hope you have a good party to celebrate. :)

  5. Crystal
    March 2, 2014 at 7:32 am #

    Awesome! How old were your parents when they married?
    Crystal recently posted.. Beloved Daughter review

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